June 16th, 2009

YAY a present for Darwin!!!!

happy happy sad

Appears to be the way my brain is working right now? Which is very odd indeed on the whole i am happy i think and i am reading more books about Buddhism and i am finding a peace within myself i didnt know was there?

But this in itself is a very odd thing as it seems to have always been there been why didnt i know about it?

And the more i find the more i am find i am tired of this life i think i need to alter things rather drastically to get to somwhere new.

I find down south calling me i think it may be time to start looking at starting again somehwhere new and make a new life for myself away from the memories and the hurt that now inhabit this city and this time of my life.

I can never get back what i have  lost nor do i want to anymore becasue it was so good getting back a small part of it would be an insult to the whole

So all i can do is move forward it seems so on with the thowing away of lots of my stuff i need to release myself from the burden of possesions and then go from there.

So that is my goal right now learn more , read more , throw away more and train in the gym more and then start loking at new jobs in new areas i am finding Brighton calling to me right now for some reason and as my company has offices down there it should be easy ish to move.

So i hope you are all well and happy i think i am finding a new happiness a more stable one.