I ache a lot from the gym as i spent most of the day there yesterday and i completely intend to spend a couple of hours there tomorrow before work.
I made really real food yesterday from vegetables and everything it was most fun and tasty.
I ma making great in roads into the land of normality so far there are no major forces massing against me that i can see.
Soon the doctor in a week or so....
MEGA EXCITING NEWS i am have arranged Saturdays off from work and sent a hopeful email to the local Buddhist centre to offering to volunteer with them. Can you please cross fingers, toes and anything else you are physically capable of without harming yourself
I am still pretty sad but i am coping by involving myself in many normal things and this is working pretty well. Tomorrow will be a MOST exciting day as i am catching up with a wonderful freind who i am not seen in ages and i simply cant wait.
I am getting the idea of compassion and it does really work , it about not thinking what i want but simply what i need and at the same time asking "will this make me happy?" instead of do i want this?
So my perspective is changing and this is good though its complex as well as simple, i am finding this true of many of the things i am learning about Buddhism and i kinda like it, its a puzzle in a simple way, like i already know the answer i just forgot and the question reminds me.
My favourite think i learnt recently and i paraphrase here, "When facing a seemingly impossible situation do not think how can i solve this or escape this , and simply remember this is just one of many lives you have lived and at some point you already figured this out, so ask yourself how did i do this before?"
When i fist read this i was v confused and cynical then i tried it and i have found it to be a most useful tool, it seems i know much more then i thought i do and simply changing my perspective of this from impossible or a challenge to simply remembering makes lots of hard things much easier.
I am spending much of my time figuring out what i have just read its very exciting