Over the next week when i have fre time i am thorwing away lots of "stuff" i am bored of this now
Then the kitchen
And then starting to look for a new job
And then.....a new house
I refuse to let myself get sad and depresed this time i am not going to turn to drinking and drugs and end up back where i was
And dam it i want a nice house and to not be in debt and all that stuff
I maybe cant have her again and thats something i will cry about and am doing BUT i can have those things and i can have a happy life eventually
So work more hours, more overtime, more sales and more bonuses yes its a crap job but its a crap job i am going to be great at.
and home....tidy , emptier and CLEAN
Yes its not a great house but its can easily be a very nice one
So me ...well i will be fine one day soon i will wake up and not reach for her, and one day i will be ok, i hope this isnt the end for me and her but if it is then we part freinds and thats great